So last night, I got in a long, long debate with someone about how Edward Cullen is abusive to Bella. I asked what they defined as abuse, and they gave examples that he withheld sex as “a weapon” and that he’d stripped the cables from her car to prevent her from seeing Jacob. Before I go on, I want to point out that Edward stripped her cables because Jacob was still in werewolf adolescence, and as Sam’s partner shows with her clawed face, Bella WAS in extreme danger by being around Jacob during his “growth spurt.” So what people are calling jealousy on Edward’s part is actually him being protective of someone he loves. Which, according to a LOT of folks, is really, really abusive and sick, and girls shouldn’t want a guy like this. Um…okay. Looks like you folks need a perspective check.
My mother had her jaw broken by my stepfather. She had to have her jaw wired shut for three months, and she ate everything with a straw. It was one of the few times she couldn’t lose her temper because she became impossible to understand if she started shouting through her sealed teeth. Mom still lived with my step-dad for another seven years after he broke her jaw.
This was one of many injuries that my mother took from my step-father, and myself being an abuse victim, at a certain point, I even convinced her to go back for more. When my step-dad finally left, he tried to choke Mom on the way out. Later, Mom said he came back to attempt a drive by on her house. This is what an abusive long-term relationship looks like.
In my own life, I’ve dealt with physical abuse, and I was sexually assaulted. I’ve been in long-term abusive relationships, both cases of neglect and of emotional abuse. As a result of all the abuse I suffered, I abused others, and I abused drugs. Because of my dark past, I can say that I’m a real world expert of abuse in all its forms. So when I say I’m having trouble seeing the abuse, I’m not a sheltered young’un who doesn’t know what she’s talking about. I’m just not seeing how being protective in a typically male way is somehow now abusive in the modern era. Moreover, I’m no longer clear on what you people would call healthy. But, looking at the news and the rise of a rape apology culture, I’m going to venture a guess that you don’t have a clue what “healthy” means anymore.