Would you like a free vampire novelette?

I’m trying to drum up five more sales on Smashwords before the end of April. It’s a small number, but I’m not finding the sales I need. So, I will try an incentive. If I can get five more sales (any title, provided it’s not a free title) before April 1st, I will release the next Vicky the Vampire story, Stark Raving Bonkers, for free. If I don’t get those sale, Vicky’s book won’t be released until this summer, at which point it will be 0.99 cents.

Blood Relations and A Job Interview With a Vampire have been very popular with readers, so it seems like I have a few vampire fans because of Vicky’s brash and cheerful attitude. I’m glad y’all like Vicky so much, and I will be happy to give y’all a free Vicky the Vampire story if you will just help me out with a little financial push to help me meet a few minor expenses. Thanks in advance to anyone who buys books in the next two days. <3

That one crazy indie chick (y_-)

Today, I am feeling like splattered shit. I’m operating on two hours of sleep, and stomach problems will not allow me to get real rest. I’m also “enjoying” some MS-related joint pain, some vertigo, and a lovely visual hallucination similar to the stuff I saw while on shrooms in Amsterdam. So, if this post gets a bit weird, that’s the reason. (I only wish I had some drugs to blame this on, but sadly, I’m sober.)

Today, on Twitter, Facebook, and most book-related blogs, there are people saying, “have you heard about that crazy indie writer?” And, the thing is, most everybody already knows exactly which crazy writer is being referred to, a certain apparently unstable lady (no, more unstable than me, if you can imagine it) who went off on a two star review because the reviewer “didn’t download the right copy.” This, she said, is “abuse” by the reviewer. That’s the first post she makes in the comments. Through later multiple messages, said author grabs progressively bigger swords for the longest and most gruesome career hara kiri ever. Even as people are advising her to put down the blades, she keeps insisting that she has a right to lose it over the review.

I actually read the review completely, whereas I could not sit through the author’s tirades. It’s worse than a slow trainwreck, which I might feel obligated to stare at and wait for the crash. This is someone beating their face on a two-way mirror, and it’s simply too awful for me to watch.

Cover, X-Box, or Guitar?

So, my birthday is coming up in 10 days, and hubby is asking what I want. For the last three birthdays, I have taken money as a gift, and turned around to buy a cover for one of my books. Which really hasn’t done much for sales. I’m often tempted to release a book sans cover, just to see if it sells better or worse, but  that’s not really what I’m talking about today.

No, this year, I’ve decided that I want an actual gift. Some of you on Twitter know I’ve had my heart set on an Xbox Kinect, and that I’ve felt this way since learning that they have dancing games. (Don’t judge me.) I would LOVE to get the dance games and LIPS, the karaoke game, and I can see spending many long nights annoying my neighbors as I try to hit the high notes in my favorite Bee Gees tunes. (I said don’t judge me, damn it!)

But, you know, I’ve also had this strong urge to learn guitar. No, playing Guitar Hero is not good enough. I want to be able to pick up a guitar and pick my way through some of my favorite songs. I’ve always loved guitars, but I admit, there’s a selfish ulterior motive to wanting the guitar: guitarists get groupies.

Guest posts: vvb32 Reads

I have not one, but TWO guest posts on vvb32 reads, and a giveaway of both Zombie Era books. You can check out excepts of Zombie Punter or Confessions of a Zombie Lover. And the giveaway for both books is really easy. The drawing is on April 10th, so you might want to head over and see about entering if you’d like to win free copies of G’s story.

Guest post: Kait Nolan

Today I have a guest post on the blog of Kait Nolan, author of Forsaken By Shadow, Devil’s Eye, and Blindsight. My topic of choice this time is paranormal couples that I’d like to read about. (preferably from other authors.) I’m trying to be inspirational and toss out some ideas for mixed couples who will give a strong storyline and realistic characters. So I hope you’ll check it out and offer your thoughts on couples you’d like to see in the comments.

Book review: Hollowland by Amanda Hocking

Hollowland is the second Amanda Hocking title I’ve picked up, though I didn’t care much for my first foray into her work with Switched. This time around, I found more to like about the characters, but the story never quite caught on with me.

Remy is a much more realistic character to my mind, and her circumstances also make her initial selfishness perfectly validated. This is not a nice happy world anymore, and people have to make hard, sometimes selfish choices to survive. Remy feels guilt for the choices she makes right away, so this converts into a sort of mothering instinct toward her younger charge, Harlow. Then there’s new arrivals Lazlo and blue, creating a sort of dysfunctional family. Or first, they get a pet lion. (No, really.) Then they pick up guys. So it’s like Zombieland, but without the cute nerdy narration. Remy is a good narrator, don’t get me wrong. But she’s rarely funny, and when she is, it’s more the scene she’s describing that’s funny than her delivery. Given the world she’s in, her style of delivery is realistic.

So what’s the problem? Well, the first obstacle the group faces is your standard religious fanatic. Given how the opening showed some new things going on with the zombies, I was really hoping this book might go in a new direction from other zombie books. But the first stop on the road trip is SOP for almost every single zombie book in existence. Got zombies? Then you’ve probably got a religious kook claiming this is proof or their visions/prophesies/interpretations of Revelations/whatever. So having it be almost the first stop on the trip dampened my enthusiasm a lot.

The story rolls through other pit stops, and some of them are more interesting than the cult leader. But nothing really stirred me like the early scenes of the book, like in the Las Vegas scene (Also a requirement for many zombie stories, a visit to the dead Sin City) where I was ready to start shouting instructions at Remy. (“No! It’s a TRAP! Hide, Remy!”)

The conclusion is…well it’s good in that Remy shows a level of self-awareness that I admire. But the ending also left me feeling very meh. It makes sense, so I’m not really complaining. It just didn’t move me that strongly. Overall, I liked the main characters and their dialogue was good. Scenery was described well enough as were the characters. It’s solid writing, and I don’t recall seeing any typos or major mistakes. There may have been some here and there, but the story was interesting enough to keep me from noting mechanical issues. The writing didn’t get in the way of the story, in other words.

But I wasn’t wowed by the story as it played out. Still it’s not a bad read, and I would recommend it to fans of zombie fiction. The zombies here are fast and organized at times, kinda like the folks in 28 Days Later, so canon-rigid diehards might find a reason to complain. I thought the zombies were interesting and a good take on the trope, so I give Hollowland 3 stars. It’s no Masterpiece Theater, but it’s miles ahead of Zombie Strippers for substance.

Danny Miller interviews me about Zombie Punter

Last month horror author Andrew Wolter introduced me to Danny Miller a writer for Positive Lite who had read Zombie Punter and wanted to do an interview with me. I have to say, I LOVE this interview because Danny didn’t send the standard “where do you get your idea from” type of interview. Instead, he came up with some really good questions about Zombie Punter, making me think long and hard about my answers. It’s a great interview, so I hope you’ll check it out.

Book review: The Company of Angels by K.H. Koehler

The Company of Angels is a grim story about one man’s fight against a plague destroying his world, and the monster drawn to him for his fighting spirit. Chris is a priest and part-time microbiologist trying to find a cure for a plague that has laid waste to most of the population. His church is full of orphans, who Chris is trying to keep protected from the plague, and from the crumbling remains of society.

This is not a happy story even before the arrival of the fair and well-spoke Julian, but his presence frightens Chris, who sees Julian as a tool of the devil, or perhaps even the devil himself. But as Chris struggles to avoid Julian, his other fight against the plague also seems to be failing just as badly. Chris is ultimately fighting a losing battle, and everyone but him can admit it. Julian’s efforts to take Chris away from this hell only makes him fight harder to change reality. That he can’t is tragic, but realistic. So the dark ending should neither be surprising nor upsetting.

As a horror story, this excels for the grim atmosphere, and for several visually intense and gory scenes. It’s a short ride, but one that packs a hard punch to the gut, and which may even draw some tears near the end. I give The Company of Angels 4 stars and recommend it to fans of horror and post-apoc fiction.

Guest post: Louise Bohmer on Sex In Horror

Today you get a guest post from the lovely Louise Bohmer, author of The Black Act and an editor of considerable skill. Today, Louise would like to talk to you about sex, in horror. No, don’t shy away, please. In fact, that’s part of what Louise wants to talk about, the aversion to sex in any writing besides erotica. And on that note, I’ll turn the floor over to Louise:
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The first sex scene I read in horror that I remember would be the scene near the end of It. I think we all know the one I’m talking about. I was sixteen, and to say it impacted me, shocked me, would be a fair assessment. But, to be honest, I never once thought of King as a pervert, or a misogynist, for the scene he wrote between Beverly and the boys. Did it make me uncomfortable? To some extent, yes, but it didn’t color my perceptions of King. Fiction, after all, is fiction, and let’s face it—sometimes we can’t control what the muse shoots out of our head. His editor ultimately passed it, and, today, millions of people have read the controversial scene between Beverly and the boys at the end of It.

A brief update on price and on a new work at Inkpop

As y’all may know, I raised my prices on my ebooks. I seem to have done this right around the time that a debate on price exploded, but I don’t have much to add to the debate. (And a gasp of shock runs through the room.) I don’t have a strong opinion on what other people should charge for their books. At least, not until someone wants to charge me a hardcover price for their ebook. The vast majority of major publishers who have hardcover prices on ebooks don’t have that much new in stock to interest me. So me shouting at them to lower prices on books I wasn’t gonna buy anyway seems like a level of petty anger that’s beyond even a shallow bitch like me. Maybe next week, if I’m bored.

No, today, I want to give y’all the one month update and let you know that the price increase has not affected my sales one way or the other. I didn’t expect a rush of new clients for a price increase, but I was scared that I would see greatly reduced sales. That didn’t happen either. I’ve got 22 sales so far this month across all my titles. We still have a few weeks, so this could end up being a great month for me, or just an average month. (Fingers crossed that the original Zombie Punter readers get the sequel, but I haven’t seen them yet.) What I take this to mean is, my choice to go with $1.99 and $2.99 on novellas and novels was not so high that I priced myself out of the market of curious readers. And, this is good. (I also take this to mean my month-long marketing attempts for the new book were an abject failure, since I only sold 5 copies on opening weekend. And this is bad. But it’s my problem, not yours, so there you go.)

In other news, I decided to post a story on Inkpop. I’m hosting Sandy Morrison & the Pack of Pussies, and I’ve already put up the first 7 chapters. I’ll update weekly on Saturdays or Sundays, but any typos or corrections you offer in comments will be fixed during the week, pronto and on the dot. Because I love you. Seriously, I’m hoping to get help from the Inkpop community to polish my story, and those of you on my blog who are Facebook users can sign in with your FB account to leave comments without setting up a full account. (Nudge, nudge)